Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category


Friday, October 6th, 2006

You can’t take it anymore. I can’t either.

You are sick of beastly buyers and pathetic prospects who hide behind voicemail, lie to you and generally make your sales life unbearable.

Even rejoicing in the misfortunes of other sales blunder victims in this book can’t get you past these professional parasites.

Would you feel better if I gave you a gift?

I have a prescription that can get you fit for work again. Fill it and be healed at


When you arrive there you will receive the tools to get revenge on these evil scoundrels. As you watch the streets in your territory fill up with prospects, notice how they toss nasty objections at you…

I won’t buy from you or your descendants

If you’d lower your price to match your IQ…

I would like to see you – on a milk carton

You sales vampires are sucking the blood out of buyers

Only buy American – Native American

I was frightened by a salesman at birth

You remind me too much of my mother

I need references; this time no relatives!

I need to talk to my spouse, partner, accountant, spirit guides

I hate salesmen, my ex-husband is one

That’s enough!

Pick up your giant mutant laser pointer and begin blasting away.

All the pressure you felt butting heads with buyers during cold calling and telemarketing will dissipate as these characters dramatically disappear from the screen.

This free, Xbox-quality graphic game was made just for you, compliments of me, your author.


No more lead generation nightmares, just justice and revenge at

(excerpt from Sales Autopsy by Dan Seidman)

World Class Sales Pros – what they do…

Thursday, October 5th, 2006

…that distinguishes them from everyone else who sells.

1) They disqualify quickly (not qualify, but disqualify first)

2) They realize that feature/benefit selling has limited use today and motivate buyers by offering both benefits and problems solving conversations

3) They respect prospects while evoking respect in return (this is a big deal in a world where prospects believe reps are snakes and reps believe prospects are liars)

4) They don’t crash on contact. Great reps have a distinct approach to create fabulous first impressions

5) They don’t earn combat pay. Handling adversity and all the negative things that occur in a selling life (up to 90% of all interactions!) is done in a healthy fashion

6) They focus on three investments for themselves – improving themselves personally (hair, clothes, shoes, appearance); improving tools (best equipment, software, pdas, etc.); improving their brainpower (sales education in class, by book, audio, video learning)

7) They participate in Mentor Mania. World class sales pros accelerate their learning process by finding a smarter, wiser individual who can coach them quickly toward success

Want more detail on these seven issues? How about some hilarious sales horror stories that reveal the truth of these strategies?

Check out the new book, Sales Autopsy (Kaplan Publishing) at the newly designed,

Hilarious Selling Blunder

Wednesday, October 4th, 2006


Scott was selling insurance “farm to farm” and had never driven a nice car. In fact, he’d never even owned a new car.

Things were going well, so the rep decided to reward himself.

Scott shopped for vehicles and because his territory was large and gas mileage was a factor, his choice was a brand new, bright red Toyota.

This was all happening in the 1990s and rural America was not as conservative as, say, the seventies. So it wasn’t really risky to be seen by farmer prospects in a Japanese car. The country was well beyond the days when they only bought American.

So Scott’s precious selling partner was washed regularly, kept up, and treasured like the valuable selling tool it was.

Then the day arrived when his brand new baby was forever marked by the life on the farm.

The salesman was stalled on a “think about it” during a call and walked out of that farmer’s home. The farm owner courteously led the rep to the front door and saw it all before the young salesman did. “It” was described by the prospect’s slow, deep drawl in a comment that challenged his car-buying decision. “That’s what you get for buying a foreign car.”

Scott had no response. He couldn’t believe what he was looking at.

The man’s biggest Billy goat had climbed on the roof of his new Toyota and completely caved it in.

“Here, git down here, you.” The farmer spoke to his animal and its hooves scratched and dented the hood as it hopped its way to the ground.

“You got insurance for that, don’t you?” He grinned at his witty joke.

In stunned silence Scott pried open the door and climbed in. The windshield was cracked and seemed ready to pop out. The new, low roof left him about six inches to see above his steering wheel.

The door kind of closed and the salesman drove home, scrunched over – ending his day early. He called his insurance company and was asked, “is this a joke?” before Scott’s rep realized that this was going to be his favorite, his most unusual claim of the year. Scott had heard the saying that selling is like going out to battle every day. He just never dreamed that his transportation could end up a casualty of war.

SalesAutopsy_cF.jpg (from Sales Autopsy, now available at

POSTMORTEM: Scott now expects the unexpected. How well do you handle adversity in your life (selling or personal)? So whatever “it” is that makes things difficult for you, get over it. Life is a long string of memorable moments – too many tough, too few good – just shake your head, grin and move on. Don’t let those rough times get your goat.

Sales Autopsy Book Excerpt

Tuesday, October 3rd, 2006

Introduction (check out the book at

It was a dreadful day’s end for Mark. His best customer called, out of courtesy, to say he was switching vendors. There went 25 percent of his revenue. Then another major prospect phoned about a 5:15 pm (hoping he’d get Mark’s voice mail) to say he was going with someone else. The future was fizzling fast for this good friend sitting next to me.

And Mark wasn’t just a friend because his wife packed extra sushi in his lunch to share with me. He was a smart sales pro, a plodder who just kept working the phones whether times were good or wretched. His day was now ending with pats on the back and condolences. You’d have thought we were at a funeral.

I came to work early the next day, 5:30 to be exact—the time when I normally pulled practical jokes on my peers. (I’d never been caught; my college days were paying off in the workplace.) I knelt down next to Mark’s desk, dug out my big white piece of sidewalk chalk, and began to draw an outline of a body.

I was gone long before anyone arrived but coincidently met Mark in the parking lot as we both came to work—me for the second time. People were already gathering around Mark’s desk and laughing when we came in. They didn’t know it then, but they were there for the birth of my Sales Autopsy logo.

While sales disasters (other people’s, of course) often provide needed humor, they can also provide much more. First, laughter is refreshing. It has a healing effect on the soul and body. This is why I collect sales horror stories. We’re in a tough business and could use some relief. In fact, when I speak, my audiences would rather hear their peers’ sales blunders during the “confession session” than absorb selling wisdom or strategies from the rest of my program.

Next, and most important, your ability to recover quickly from irritating, even disastrous experiences in your sales life is a measure of your mental health. You must move forward quickly, perhaps taking time to learn a quick lesson from the experience, in order to keep focused on your goal to build your business.

Have you ever had the crushing feeling that there’s somehow a gap between you and greatness? Throughout this book you will discover, through laughter and the hard-earned experience of those who’ve gone before you, ways to close that gap.

The ideas, strategies, and concepts inside these pages have been compiled from more than 600 sales horror stories and ensuing interviews with your peers. Through these stories and my training and coaching practice, I’ve discovered three larger commonalities among world-class sales professionals. They all

  1. qualify and disqualify prospects quickly;
  2. move beyond traditional 20th-century selling techniques and employ newer strategies that savvy prospects can’t counter; and
  3. invest in themselves in three ways: by upgrading appearance, utilizing great tools, and boosting their selling brainpower.

How can you quickly attain elite status in selling? Share what you discover here with someone else who sells. When you become the teacher, you learn most quickly. And the faster you put your most useful learning moments from this book into play, the more quickly you become the master.

My hope is that you are not just affected but inspired to improve from the ideas you’re about to absorb. I trust this book becomes a blessing to your income, career, and mostly, your family.

Dan Seidman,

Barrington, IL

P.S. Did you know that, if you lay all the really bad prospects from end to end around the world, 76 percent of them would drown?

The Arrival of Sales Autopsy

Monday, October 2nd, 2006

Today Sales Autopsy the book hits bookstores across the country (Kaplan Publishing).


Barnes & Noble is the online and brick and mortar partner of choice, offering great discounts for salesforces buying large quantities. In particular, we love them because they actually have a salesforce of their own.

Every month those sales team members read one book. You’ve probably guessed which one it is for October.

They’re reading Sales Autopsy because aside from being packed full of hilarious selling blunders, it reveals the top seven ways that world class sales pros distinguish themselves from everyone else who sell. Here is the table of contents…

SALES AUTOPSY by Dan Seidman

FOREWORD by Best-selling author Jeffrey Fox



My Top Five Sales Horror Stories


Disqualify Prospects Quickly


Old School is Closed


Calculating Clients and Conniving Reps


Failed First Impressions


Adversity over Products, Prospects & Animals


Three Investments for Sales Pros


Mentor Mania and How to Get some


What are we Selling for?


A. Where do we go from here?

B. Revenge of the Reps: The Video Game

B. Things you Love to Say to Evil Prospects: An Exercise

C. Your Most Embarrassing Moment Selling

Sales Autopsy is a unique gift for your sales team. Call or email me today or visit

Come get your fix of laughter and learning.

Buy now, you know this is one book you’d love to read.

Dan Seidman, 847-359-7860

Friday Thinking

Friday, September 29th, 2006

The end of your Friday should be the start of next week.

Don’t waste time launching into your Monday workload when you show up after the weekend. Begin to plan your activities, everything, for Monday during the last 30-45 minutes on Friday. Which phone calls and when? Who needs to be emailed? Best times for both?

TIP: Optimal time for email is reaching someone after 1pm. Inbox is clear from overnight junk and early day emailers crying for attention.

This strategy applies every day of the week. The last half hour of today is always the start of tomorrow.

You’ll be pleasantly surprised how much more you’ll accomplish when you begin to blast into your workday – without first thinking through it.

That’s smart Friday Thinking.

Help! (that would be you asking)

Thursday, September 28th, 2006

I spoke yesterday at the Motivation Show in Chicago. You’ve got to go sometime. It’s for all the companies that provide incentive trips to sales forces, company events, etc.

So all the airlines are there, and hotels, and both the usual and unusual gifts you might expect to receive or give as rewards.

In my talk I tell people that the association has hired me to speak and, to that end, everyone in the audience is my client.

Feel free to call me or email me with anything that might be a question related to your sales struggles.


This baffles me. It has always baffled me since I began offering this six years ago. I’m now overly baffled and not sure this condition is good for a sales pro and good-hearted coach.

Having the guts to say, “Can you help with this one thing…?” is a big step toward higher success levels.

Why struggle alone?

So, I’ll say it to you, my blog audience, got a question? Lay it on me.

Don’t be surprised if a little brainpower and teamwork with the Sales Autopsy guy doesn’t get you past the hump.

And you’ll not suffer from this confusing condition prospects put you through – death by bafflement.

Brinkmann Corp on how to Antagonize Prospects

Wednesday, September 27th, 2006

Just yesterday visited the Motivation Show in Chicago where I am speaking today (11am cst).

A friend of mine, ex-fighter pilot and professional speaker Rob “Waldo” Waldman stood in line with me for about 15 minutes waiting for a sample hot dog or sandwich from the Brinkmann booth. They were showing off their grills.

As we got to the front a woman stopped us and said “customers only.” She said it loudly and from about 10 feet away. We had our backs to her, so she had to have seen our badges (speaker badges, no less!) earlier.

No sign or indication that this is an “exclusive invite” to offer a 15 cent incentive to people. And I understand that not everyone at a show is a prospect, too.

But, it might have been smarter of that employee to just let us have a bite to eat, rather than generate animosity toward her and her firm.

Add to that the fact that EVERYONE on the show floor, showing up for the food, was neither a customer nor a prospect, and you realize how silly her actions seemed to my friend and I.

How are you doing interacting with EVERYONE? Do you push some away, simply because you pre-judge them? I’m not talking about disqualifying bad prospects, that comes shortly after connecting. I am talking about welcoming interested potential fans and friends with open arms. It’s a consumer product for goodness sakes! Buyers are distributors AND end users (that would include Waldo and I), right?

Brinkmann was a bust from a public relations standpoint. I’m embarrassed that someone’s attempt to embarrass us had to be so public and loud.

Treat everyone well, you never know who might be writing for 2 million readers a month.

Thinking Ahead, Way Ahead…

Tuesday, September 26th, 2006

Homeland Security has now, in its infinite wisdom, decided that some liquids are okay to carry on the plane. IF you buy them at the airport after going through security!

As my brother who sent this to me noted, “The powerful airport terminal store lobby strikes!”

Hey, let’s figure out a way to rip off passengers! They can only buy from us at outrageously inflated prices. You know where they got this grand idea? Sounds a bit like the oil companies.

This choice is a perfect example where the ability to predict the future distinguishes great decision-makers from professional screw-ups.

Think about this;

Liquids/gels could be dangerous.

But they can now be purchased in the airport itself.

Are security procedures in place related to shipment and stocking of product at the stores?

Are security procedures in place related to the manufacture of lipstick, shaving lotions, perfume and more? Anyone could smuggle a dangerous version of these products into a box meant for airport store delivery.

Are security procedures in place to screen retail personnel when they’re hired?

Think, sales pros!

Look at every way that your actions could have an effect on the world, your world of prospects, clients, colleagues and family members way, way down the road.

Again, great decision-makers have the ability to predict the future.

How do you rate yourself? Great, okay or need work on this?

Bono and Bill

Monday, September 25th, 2006

I watched a video yesterday of U2’s Bono being interviewed by Bill Hybels who runs one of the largest churches in America – Willow Creek (and its training association). Amazing video and it’s, at least for now, unavailable because of the use of U2’s music.

I was shocked at the wit and wisdom of the rock star as he passionately called for viewers to help end global poverty and it’s evil cousin, the AIDs epidemic.

Bono was recently named Time Magazine’s person of the year (along with Bill & Melinda Gates). He’s using his rock star status to gain audiences with kings and prime ministers to literally embarrass the well-to-do into balancing a world that has too many with too little or too much of nothing.

His eloquence should inspire sales pros to carefully craft their words for maximum influence. My favorite Bono example was a phrase that explained the zeal for his cause and countless hours he puts into this work “When I throw a punch it’s not my strength behind it. It’s the strength of an idea whose time has come.”

Can you take the time to re-write the words you use in order to better motivate buyers? The payoff is higher earnings, but you also will impress prospects with your eloquence and passion.

Resources: Bono – Willow Creek –